Saturday, December 22, 2007

Taking a Stand Against American Women!


The truth is I make much too much fun of American women and their hang-ups. You can say what you want about their propensity to crying and their daddy issues, but I think I am right about a few very distinct things.

You may never tell an American woman that the moon is a spotlight on our city. You can never tell her that stars are plentiful or beautiful. You can tell her that things are magical, but she won't believe it. You can tell her anything, and she won't believe it. American women believe nothing.

You also cannot count on them for anything. Do not count on them for appointments of any kind. If you would like to be stood up, make a date with an American woman. American women have been permitted to behave like children, so what should anyone expect? They treat service personnel like garbage, and that is a crime.

I keep giving them chances because I think I find some redeeming quality in them, but it is not enough to outweigh their culture. And let's face it, they are a product of their culture. American women delight in their child-like behavior. They turn men into children with it. American men love to behave like children, so this works out fine.

I am lost when it comes to love in America. I am lost in America. America does not love me.

6 comments:

tyler williams said...

I think the same can be said for German women. Actually, in many of these points, German women are more extreme. At least American women have an emotional core, a pulsing heart that can be reached in moments of abandonment and affection.

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Jack Morgan said...

Funny enough, it was in Germany where I made the rules, no Americans and no Germans. It was a great rule, and I was much happier. I will not date German women or American women anymore. If you hear about me dating one, I will make an excuse, saying how they are different or something. I have already rationalized breaking these rules.

tyler williams said...

But American women possess a wide array of various cultural backgrounds, beliefs, attitudes whereas German women generally come from one primary cultural background...of course, there's an infinite number of exceptions, but the concept of German culture is less pluralistic than American culture. But they can never be different. An American woman will always be an American woman. You'll rationalize it because you wake up, look out your front window, and realize they're everywhere.

Jack Morgan said...

I met more people from different cultural backgrounds in Germany than I do here. America is not really pluralistic, even if it is its beautiful dream.

For the record, though, I don't date German women either. When I lived in Germany, I found them somewhat abrasive. I found them too much like American women.

I don't believe in strict rules either. I will probably break this one eventually, but I think that American women come to base with a strike against them.

CLAY BANES said...

It's true, America does not love you.

Jenny Drai said...

I weep for all of you.